Reconciling After Your Divorce

Divorce brings about a flurry of powerful emotions. While many people who go through a divorce go on to remarry, there are a small number of people who actually find love again – with their former spouse. If you’re considering reconciliation with your ex-spouse after divorce, proceed with caution and heed these tips.

Can You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse?

There’s no law that prohibits remarrying a spouse, but there are a few legal implications to consider. Once the courts have issued a judgement and a divorce decree, remarrying may require the assistance of a family law attorney.

You might, for example, be surprised to find out that your remarriage doesn’t negate the provisions in your divorce decree. Here’s an example: it’s common for spouses to waive their right to inherit from the other, but remarriage doesn’t reverse this judgement. If you wish to inherit assets from your spouse, you’ll have to consider a new estate plan.

The other major issue concerns spousal support. If your divorce judgement provides spousal support to one of you, the courts will terminate this arrangement when you remarry. If, however, your spousal support agreement ended before you remarried but you divorce a second time, then the courts may only take the length of the second marriage into consideration when drawing up a spousal support agreement. In other words, a second marriage and divorce may significantly impact the division of assets.

Should I Reconcile After Divorce?

If you’ve been through the pain of a divorce, you know the toll it takes financially and emotionally. Yet, some people have lingering regrets about their decision and want to reconcile. If you’re wondering if this applies to you or think you want to give your marriage another go, ask yourself the following:

  • Why do I want to remarry? Is it loneliness, comfort, or a mixture of both? Think of why you wanted to divorce in the first place. Have you resolved the issues that caused your marriage problems? We can all learn from the past, change, and become better people. The real question is: have you both learned enough to make it work the second time around?
  • Am I taking it slow enough? You and your ex-spouse shared a relationship for years, so it’s seems natural to jump in where you left off. Without communicating about some basic issues and setting boundaries, however, you risk being right back where you started.
  • Have you renewed trust in one another? Successful relationships require a foundation of mutual respect and trust. If you want to reconcile, take steps to ensure your relationship’s underpinning is strong. This may take counseling or other therapy. It may also require that you take the time to experience one another before jumping right back into marriage – go on dates, have long conversations, and experience new things together.

When to Consult an Attorney

In certain instances, reconciliation after divorce will require the help of an experienced family law attorney. An Orange County family lawyer can help with:

  • Estate planning services to negate the conditions of the divorce decree, if applicable.
  • Prenuptial agreements for the arrangement of spousal support and division of assets in light of a second divorce.
  • Alternative dispute resolution services, as applicable.

Reconciliation after divorce has many legal implications, from the division of assets to the allocation of spousal support. If you’re considering reconciliation with your ex-spouse, take it slowly and ensure you’ve addressed the issues underlying your divorce before tying the knot again. No matter which method you choose, be sure you’ve both changed enough to make it work the second time around – or that you can live with the things you cannot change.